About Me

My photo
Red Bluff, CA, United States
The life of us: a single mother and her 5 resilient, awe-inspiring children. Currently a part-time waitress and full-time nursing student with the simple hopes of retaining my sanity, or at least enough of it, in order to seek employment upon graduating. In the meantime I hope to encourage, love, teach, and in the end release each of my children into the world as independent thinkers, selfless Christians, hard-working contributors, and appreciative life seekers. Herein lies bits of that journey.

Monday, March 14, 2011

Maybe I'm doing something right?

Sometimes, oftentimes, I sit and wonder... wonder how I got so blessed, and even moreso why? Every night I lay in bed and think about the things I wish I would've done differently throughout the day. After I'm done feeling guilty I prioritize the things I'm going to work on doing better the next day and brainstorm ways in which I could accomplish that. And without fail, every night, being a better mother is on that list... at the top... every night. I have AMAZING kids. It's that plain and simple. And I guess everyone thinks that? There must be some sort of ingredient God included in us when he designed us to be partial to our own children. But I can't help but to think sometimes that I'm extra blessed with really awesome kids. And one thing that would make me a better mother is to tell them that. It seems simple enough, right? But I find myself telling myself that EVERY NIGHT. I've tried to figure out why that is. Why it's not till 11 o'clock at night when I go to get a cup out of the cupboard that I've noticed Savannah unloaded and loaded the dishwasher earlier in the day all by herself without me asking? Why it's the next day, when the kids are at school, when I open the blinds to the patio, that I noticed Shane took the trash bag that I had set outside down to the trash bin without me asking? How everyday I walk by Lacey's room and look in to see everything neatly in it's place and the only time I say something to her about it is when I'm reminding her she's left something out? Why does it take Dion spiraling into an emotional breakdown because her morning isn't going as planned for me to hear her tell me her plans included taking care of the babies so I could sleep in and then rubbing my feet and making me breakfast? Ugh. It brings me to tears just typing those last four sentences. This all occurred to me, again, as it often does, last week on report card day when I picked the kids up from school.

The younger two girls got picked up first and handed me their envelopes:

Dion - 1st Grade -

She received a Perfect Attendance Award and scored all 4's (Proficient or Advanced) and all O's (outstanding) on her report card.
"There have been 57 homework assignments. Your child has turned in 57 of them. That
is 100% which is a/an A+."
"I have assigned 1160 minutes of reading. Your child has turned in 1388 minutes. That is 100+% which is a/an A+."
"Dion is doing well in all areas. She is well liked, a good leader, and well behaved in class. Good job on turning in the home reading this semester. She turned in over 100%. Thank you. Dion has met all of the reading goals and many of the math goals for first grade. She now needs to concentrate on writing. I would love to see her using more descriptive words and more complex sentences in her writing."


Savannah - 3rd Grade -

She received a Perfect Attendance Award (with one excused absence) and all 4's and O's on her report card.
"Savannah continues to be an outstanding student. She has been helpful to me in many ways. She is a fine student and assumes responsibility well. She enjoys helping others, which has put her into a leader's role in class."


I told them how proud I was of them. It was brief and not nearly at the level of excitement that it rightly deserved. Then I picked up Lacey.

Lacey - 5th Grade -

She received a Perfect Attendance Award and not only did she get a 4.0 but she got A+'s with all O's in Attitudes and Work Habits and all 4's in State Standards.
"Lacey Mae's GPA is very easy to figure out - 4.0!! Very good - Outstanding! Lacey Mae is a joy to teach!"

The ah-ha moment that led me to this post was what followed. Lacey was in the third row, beaming as I read it - as she deserved to be, and when I finished I turned, looked back at her, and holding my hand up said, "Awesome! Good job, Lace!". She looked at my hand, looked at me, then as if out of pity slowly reached up and slapped my open hand with hers and said, gently, "Mom, high five's are so last year. It's knuckles now."

Now had I praised them more often surely I would have known to offer her my closed fist instead of a my open palm. From now on I will not be so "old skool". I will offer praise more often so that next report card, I will not inappropiately offer knuckles when it's surely changed to something more cool.

So learn from my failure and praise someone today- whether it's your kids, your significant other, or a stranger. Just tell someone, "Good job!", and offer them your knuckles. :)


p.s.~ Shane is beyond amazing too... I just haven't gotten his report card in the mail yet. And Abigail? Well... just look at her pictures! lol. There really are no words for her.

No comments: