I miss them.

"The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness." ~ Honore' de Balzac

"Children are the anchors that hold a mother to life." ~ Sophocles

Hi. I have been meaning to write a blog for the last week now since finding out I got a job. I know it's probably going to be a big surprise to a lot of you, as it was me, because I know I wasn't looking or planning on employment, right. School is still going to be a priority. I will continue on in it but taking fewer units, meaning fewer scholarships and less financial aid, meaning another source of income would be a good idea. This last semester was a big learning experience. 10 years ago and a few kids less and sure... 14 units would be a breeze. But it's really unreasonable for me to think I could do it... or at least do it and do it well... with all the different directions I am going. That is really hard for me to admit to be honest.

So, I would love to tell you about my job as I am really excited about it. It's a blessing, really... considering the circumstances I am very thankful. But I don't feel like talking about it right now. :( Because at the moment I am forcing myself to think positively about the job. Because no matter how many things are wonderful about it... no matter how ideal or a God-send this job is, it takes me from my kids - bottom line. The pros could be 10 pages long and you put missing my kids, more specifically Dion since I can be off in time to get the older kids from school, on the con list and game over. She's my other half. The last three/four years have not been the most pleasant for us, and I'm sitting here crying because I think I am coming to a realization in this very moment through the experiences of this last week, and I think I have put a big burden on my children.

They are my life. They define me. I am nothing and no one if I am not their mother. Is that wrong?

And now I go take them to all of their places in the morning and I go to work and I sit at my desk (actually I'll describe the job to you later as that is not really an accurate description of what I do) and I think to myself, "What now. What is this? Who am I?". I mean, sure I've been away from them here and there before. But fortunately, thanks to technology, I've been able to attend school the last couple years via internet courses and night classes without having to leave them much. And you know what's weird is that even if I were home and the older three were away at school I would still be feeling like I was being their mother; I would be making their beds, washing their stinky socks, stubbing my toe on their toys, cleaning up toast crumbs that were all over the kitchen from breakfast. I'd be cleaning out their hamsters cage that they just HAD to have. And now I don't do that. My house sits here empty and quiet all day and I don't like it. Today was Dion's first day at a new babysitters. I dropped her off and ruined my makeup on the way to work crying about it. She was fine about it. I had to tickle a kiss and squeeze out of her because she was so excited about going. It's a young girl from our church, about 15 I think, who actually taught Dion's Sunday school class for a while. Her name is Jordan and her parents are the Youth Ministry Leaders at Calvary Chapel. I KNOW she is a great girl and her whole family adores my kids so I can't even begin to tell you how much I have thanked God that she is available to watch Dion for me. I did have a laugh when I picked her up today and she told me about her morning. :) Remind me to tell you about it later when my screen isn't so blurry from tears. It has to do with a "phat fuffy tat". lol.

Anyway, grrrr... I guess, like everything else in life, this will be an adjustment and it will take time and we are us so we will make it through and be just fine. Right? You know... this brings me onto another topic I probably shouldn't talk about when I am in this state. But oh well. Mike. I try not to be bitter or talk badly about him. We all have our demons - this, I know. And I will always care about him and his well being. But really, it's moments like these when my heart hurts for my children and all I want is what's best for them and I can't give it to them. I can't because he is selfish and he screwed it all up. Everyone knows how long and hard I tried to save our family. And most importantly... I finally know. I finally realize that I really did do EVERYTHING in my power to salvage the family and the life that I had built and that I had wanted to last forever. And when it shattered into a million pieces I thought I'd never be able to put it back together... but we have and the kids and I are better for it. And I know that if ever God sends a man and a father into our lives he will absolutely be the most appreciated and cherished person to walk this Earth. Should it never happen... we are still okay.

Anyway, that was way off track. The point is... I miss Dion. I miss feeling like a good Mother and homemaker. But it's only been 4 days, it's bound to get easier. But is that such a good thing? I don't want it to get easier. I mean, I do... but I don't. Grrr... I just mean, I don't want to be okay with not being everything my children need - after all, I'm all they have. Hopefully you know what I mean.

"Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see." ~ John W. Whitehead. What will that message be? When my children are grown what will they say about the kind of Mother I was? Was I too busy at work to volunteer in their class like everyone else's mother did? Did we eat take-out too much cause I was too tired to cook? Did they have to wear the same pants two days in a row because I forgot to do laundry? Did I not open my mind to the possibility of finding a responsible man to be a good influence in their lives?

Does every single mom go through this? Just in case they do... I will pray for them, everyday. I will pray their hearts don't hurt as much as mine right now and that they will find the strength to get up and go another day no matter what.

I'll be back soon with a much more pleasant blog. :) God Bless! ~me~

Discovered a great show, I think.

Okay, so I'm in a good mood and am really finding much of everything quite easily amusing this morning. Tell you something you didn't already assume as much from me, right? Shush. :)

So I was at Blockbuster last night letting Shane and his friend that was staying over get a couple Playstation games, because you know the small fortune that I've invested in the stacks of games I've already bought just don't cut it when there is a friend over.... noooooo, we have to go and spend half of what my car costs to rent new video games. So anyway, I was walking around the store talking on my phone (surprise, surprise) and I came across these wall pictures that Blockbuster has for sale in there. There were a row of ones from the tv show, The Office. Anyone watch that? Well I don't. I mean, I've seen bits and pieces of it a few times or saw a commercial for it while watching Dr. Phil or something. (which, that is a lie because I don't even know what channel The Office is on but Dr. Phil is really the only show that I might make time to watch if I know it's going to be a good one... so I just connected the dots. Don't correct me if I'm wrong. ;) Anywayyyyy... so I was reading them to this guy that I was talking to, probably making an ass outta myself, okay - you can stop with the what's new thing, and I was dying laughing. But, because I have absolutely NO ability to retain things of such a useless, albeit hysterical, nature I've forgotten what the posters said. I could call the guy and ask him if he rememebers what they were but he likely doesn't and I don't want to force him to have to admit to not paying attention to my pointless, random rants. Soooo... all that to get to this point... I was Googling quotes from The Office trying to find the one that I thought was so funny... and I haven't found it yet because I got distracted by me laughing so hard... but I have found some other ones. Thought maybe you'd enjoy, and if you don't... fake it! Here they are:

Michael (reading Dwight's complaint): "This morning, I knocked myself in the head with the phone."
Jim: That actually took awhile. I had to put uh more and more nickels into his handset, til he got used to the weight, and then I just … took them all out.

Ok, so that one you have to visualize... think of someone that really annoys you and then picture all the time invested in adding coins to the earpiece of their phone paying off when you take the coins out and they answer the phone next and slam it into their temple. lol. And no, people don't put the phone up to their temple but temple or forehead is funnier than slaming it into their ear... really. Okay, now reread the quote. It's funnier. Trust me.

Dwight Schrute: Okay, first, let's go over some parameters. How many people can I fire?
Michael Scott: Uh, none: you're picking a healthcare plan.
Dwight Schrute: Okay we'll table that for now...

lol. That would probably be me if I were a boss. How many people can I fire when I am supposed to be picking a healthcare plan? lmfao. And I watched a clip online so if you have ever seen the show you'll know how dry and mundane these people are, which makes it even funnier.

Jan: Michael, it has nothing to with your looks, okay? It's your– it's your personality. I mean you're obnoxious, and rude, and, and, and… stupid. And… you do have coffee breath, by the way. And, and, I don't agree about the B.O., but you are very, very inconsiderate.
Michael Scott: So, my looks don't have anything to do with it?
Jan: [sighs] Oh God.

Wouldn't it be great to be able to be brutally honest like that? I'd feel much better. They wouldn't. But how is that releveant really? lol. KIDDING!

Okay, so I've a ton more but I bet half of you are already phoning the Emergency Crisis Center hotline to see if the local looney bin has an avaliable bed. Save yourself some time... they don't.. I checked. What? I needed a vacation! But seriously, it's Red Bluf... they don't. ;)

Lots more stuff to write about... but I got all of my bins of Christmas decorations out this morning and I've no chitlins running around so I am going to exercise my cleaning and organzing and decorating OCD a bit.

Hope this finds you all having a great weekend!!!

xo ~me~

Let the rain fall, I don't care.

Bleugh!!!

So I've been sitting here meaning to write a blog. I've started typing only to delete several times now, which is frustrating as I don't have time to be wasting - generally speaking. So now I have to run to class... well after I shower and take the kids to Megan's... and I don't feel better like I thought a good 72 w.p.m. typing session would do me. I don't really know what will make me feel better, except for time, and that's out of the question because all of my patience is spent on so many other aspects of my life... for parts of my life I just want immediate gratification. I know, selfish and impossible, but I don't remember saying that I was going to be rational or reasonable in this blog, did I? No. Good. :)

Sometimes it seems as though a good long rant about nothing, everything, something, anything... would help to clear my head and maybe bring about a sense of relief or clarity. But probably not. Not for me atleast. Most of you know I can talk circles around you... just imagine for a second all the circles I talk around myself. lol.

Alright, so here's what I've done. I ended up typing again... a whole new speal... that makes three now. lol. But instead of deleting this one I've copied and pasted it elsewhere and just may post it should I still feel the need later. INSTEAD... here my mood swing... lmao...
Life is just fine. Sure, it could be better. But then again, it could get much worse. So I am going to be grateful... for my health, for my healthy children whom I don't have to beat in order for them to be amazingly wonderful because God gifted them to me like that naturally. I am going to be thankful for the headache I have after hours of homework because it means I'm smart enough and blessed enough to have the oppurtunity for an education in which to be able to provide for my kids better. I am going to be thankful for the ache that my heart feels when I miss someone specific because it means I am still capable of genuine care and love despite the wall I thought I had previously built. I will be thankful for the friends that I have because they are amazing and it means I am doing something right in order to have these people in my life.
None of this means I am fake or putting on a front... there are things in my life right now that I would give up a LOT to change... what this means is that I choose to not let it get the best of me. Things that are meant to be will be. And things that aren't will fade away. Either way...

everything is going to be alright.

Anyone who bought all that should pay me... really... that was a LOT of effort. hahaha.

I'm nauseous. That's good though. Better than bing eating out of depression. :) What an ugly cycle that would be.

... more to come...

My view from the peanut gallery.

Homemaking a major at one college

Okay... so this is a little behind the news, I know... but I've been busy; and thank goodness for the old addage that things are better late than never. The clip above is from August 24th... you can watch it now or later or never... whichever you prefer. I saw it when it aired back in August and I sat down at my computer real quick and typed a letter about it. I don't know that I ever really planned on sending it... but I guess, like EVERYTHING else under the sun, I had an opinion on it. So I'll share with you. :) You lucky dog, you! ;)

Keep in mind this was typed out in just a few minutes... because I'm not actually sending it I never took the time to really proofread or format or anything... so just try to follow my infamous rabbit trails. lol.

To: The Today Show


I was watching your show this morning and my ears perked up when I heard the story on the Southern Baptist College that is now offering a degree in homemaking. Despite packing three lunches, loading cereal bowls into the dishwasher, stopping to brush hair and help tie shoes, all the while randomly remembering and adding items to my shopping list on the fridge, I couldn’t help but get slightly offended by your female guest speaker. I’m not including men in this argument as they were not a part of the discussion for this college course. Homemaking is a choice, a lifestyle, something to take pride in and enjoy. According to USA Today 5.4 million mothers are making that decision. It’s amazing how when a tragedy occurs within the youth’s population, whether it be a shoot-out in a school, increased drug use and pregnancy, or just plain disrespect society immediately turns to the parents with millions of fingers asking where “we” were and holding us accountable. Well then what’s wrong with offering education about proven ways to run a successful home and enjoy a productive, less-stressed home life?

I can think of two non-religious clichés about child rearing to help prove my point:
“Children are our future.” Well I know that I want my future to be as bright as possible. And if there is a class out there that teaches me at least one lesson or skill on how to be more self-confident and successful in my role as a parent then I’d take it. I mean… I don’t know about you but I sure as heck did not birth an instruction manual along with each of my four children.
“The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.” I would love to know how to be a strong tree with healthy branches made of knowledge. Homemakers can be like carpenters… they could go around with one hammer in their toolbox hoping to fix everything they came across by just knowing how to use a hammer, or they could fill their toolbox with the tools and the knowledge of how to use these tools and in what situation each tool works best and be prepared for any situation.

If knowledge is power, and most agree is it, then I would LOVE the opportunity to be the most powerful mom, wife, and homemaker possible by learning the information and gaining the knowledge to be the most productive, efficient homemaker I could be. The satisfaction I get from knowing I raised productive, respectful, healthy children in today’s world; knowing my husband (for purposes of this argument, we’ll pretend I have one – and no, I don’t think I’m divorced because I need this course, lol) can come home to a healthy, home-cooked meal after a hard day’s work and sleep in a clean bed; knowing everyone who lives in my home feels safe and free to be who they are as individuals in a world of judgment – could not be surpassed by any gold nameplate on a door followed by letters like CEO or VP, or any place in the Fortune 500 companies.

If I were to spend money on an education why not make it one as versatile as homemaking? An education that can be used up until the very day I die, and more importantly, one that I can pass down to my children and around to my friends and family. I would love to defend the millions of homemakers that were cheerfully Windexing their television screen, who stopped to rub a bit harder over that critics face, and tell her this opportunity for education isn’t time-warping us back to the 50’s. Contrarily, it’s preparing us for better tomorrow and a sense of security - despite our 5-year-old’s card flips in Kindergarten, our teenagers speeding tickets, the burnt casserole, the falling down stacks of laundry, or our husband’s boot prints or tie left on the ground – that just maybe, we know what we are doing and are one of the best in our chosen field.

Sincerely, A hep-chick in her poodle skirt with pink rollers in baking a pie in the kitchen while listening to Elvis Presley and watching I Love Lucy. ;)

Newest Fav Band/Song

So I've stumbled across a pretty fabulous band called Johnny Panic. All their songs are amazing but this cover song seems fitting for our page as the kids adore it. Hope you enjoy. xo

Still alive. :)

Hiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!

Here's your icon for this post. :) I figured you'd be looking for it so I'll get it up right from the get go.

Thank goodness you all love me so much. lol. Shall we give it another go? I mean... even if I keep up the way I have been you'll at least get one or two decent updates out of me in a year. Ohhhh, where to begin.

Well, I was rereading some of my other posts and boy are my kids cute. ;) I suppose I'll start with them since they are so fantastic. One of those good news first scenarios. Although, I don't know that I have any real bad news at the moment. Well that's not entirely true, but we'll see how positive I can make it. lol.

This probably sounds a little repetitive of my first post back in February or whenever it was, but it was parent/teacher conferences again last month. This time Shane is in the 4th grade, Lacey in 2nd, and it's Savannah's first year of kindergarten. This is our first full year in public school so I was a little hesitant. However, I am the product of public school and seem to have survived the tragedy. lol. I really am not saying anything bad about public school, Grandma Lengtat has been a public school teacher forever. I guess I just like the idea of a Christian private school because back when I was going through my restraining order and divorce and stuff, when Shane was the only one in school, he went to a Catholic school. It was great education-wise but it exposed him to contradictory beliefs that I was in no position to answer at that time. It was all I could do to get through 2 minutes, let alone trying to explain to my 6 year old why we don't give Mother Mary presents even though everyone else in his school does. Anyway, this realization also reiterated how much MORE pressure there would be if he went to a public school. I was lucky/dumb enough to make it financially possible for the three older kids to go to a Christian private school for at least their pre-k and kindergarten years, Shane even into the 2nd grade. Except for Savannah who is in Kindergarten this year. Well that was quite the unnecessary spill... all of that to get to this...

I love parent/teacher conference days.

I had two the other day: one for Lacey and the other one for Savannah. The conferences went GREAT! Savannah's was first, the preschool she went to was very academically oriented so she had a great start. But we read a lot at home and do a lot of arts and craft and stuff so I like to think that all helps. Plus I also like to believe my kids inherited some of my natural smarts. :P Her teacher showed me her report card and to make a long story short, Savannah has met and/or exceeded ALL of the standards for entering the 1st grade at the beginning of this, her Kindergarten year. She is so far ahead of all the other students in her class. The teacher said that nonetheless she still is enthusiastic about doing all her work and doing a really good job. The greatest part was that she said Savannah is such a sweetheart and very obedient and follows directions very well. And also that she is very helpful and plays great with all the other kids. She called her the "teacher's dream" of a student. YAY! :) :) This is a relief to me as I worry about her sometimes.... she was at a REALLY vulnerable age when things were ugly with her dad so I worry how much of a negative impact that will have on her. But so far, so good. :)

Then it was Lacey's turn. Lacey went to the same private school for Kindergarten that Savannah did pre-school so I know that helped. Plus last year they tried to see if I wanted to let Lacey skip a grade since she had tested at a higher grade level. I said no thanks. Anyway, we sat down and her teacher said basically he had nothing really to say except that she is the perfect student. She, alone, he said, sets the mood in the entire class and it's always positive. He said she is like his teacher aide because she always finishes her work first and gets a perfect score and then is always thoughtful enough to go around and help other kids. He said I should write a parenting book! WOO-HOO! :) :) He ranted and raved the entire time, showing me all of her 100 percent score in all subjects, math, reading, language, etc. Her reading stars are already off the chart and the semester is only half over. :)

I had Shane's parent/teacher conference a couple days later. It went really well, especially considering I wasn't too sure about it. They've put Shane in a combined classroom. A 4th/5th grade class, with one teacher, 30 students, and no aid. Can we say.... "RED FLAGS"??? I mean this is Shane's first year with letter grades, first year where he is actually going to be held accountable for his work. And at 9 years old I don't expect that he will be as independent and focused on his own as he should be to do really really well. A 5th grader? Yes, perhaps, at least more likely. Anyway, I was less than thrilled at the beginning of the school year but since I really liked the teacher, and am one for always giving something a chance (or too many chances which is a whole nother can of blog), I decided to bear with it till Back to School Night to be able to go and see what it was about and by then have a feel for how Shane was doing. Well back to school night only reiterated my assumption on how independently the kids had to work. I listened to her explain how she splits her time between the fourth and fifth graders and how most of their tests and stuff are taken on computers. What happened to lecture time? What happened to class projects? I don't know... I just wasn't feeling it I guess, and as a mother you either feel it or you don't. End of debate. I was also looking at his grades and he had taken 4 maths tests... three were A's and one was a D. Huh? So I checked into it. And it turns out that the one he got a really bad grade on he simply wasn't prepared for with scratch paper and stuff because it was long hand math problems. Since his teacher was on the 5th grader side of the room he wasn't allowed to get up from the computer to fetch supplies. Here is the problem, I expect that Shane be prepared, I'm not excusing that it was ultimately his responsibility to have his supplies ready. I am, however, drawing attention to the fact that had he been in a traditional classroom it is reasonable to assume he could raise his hand a retrieve the needed supplies. Anyway... that was exactly my concern. I expect that Shane bring home good grades by making good choices to pay attention in class and do the required work to the best of his abilities. On the same token, I will not fault him for issues of political/money saving tactics employed by the school district that impede his ability to adjust and learn the ropes of his newly independent work load. So that was Back to School Night about a month and a half ago. After a couple lengthy, very productive chats with his teacher expressing my concern and expectations, I decided to leave Shane in there. Back to the point of the parent/teacher conference. HE IS DOING GREAT! He has all A's with the exception of 2 B's. He made the Honor Roll. And his teacher said he is one of the most responsible, on task students in her class. :) :) :) I'm so proud of him!! I am so proud of them all.

Last, but certainly not least, is Ms. Dion Marie. She "home schools" as she tells everyone. Which is her take on sitting at the kitchen table with me in the morning coloring and writing her alphabet and numbers while I study. She is quite the smarty pants though. She can write her own name, recognize almost all letters of the alphabet, count to 20 and write most of her numbers, among a slew of other really impressive feats for a 3-year-old. She gets a little restless without the old kids around as she is far from used to being an "only child" - especially now that our little foster boy, Arik, has gone.

Well I've so much more to write. But this shall tide you over until next time, which I promise will be sooner than the year 2014. :)

I sincerely hope this finds you all well. Look forward to hearing from you.

xo

~Heather and Kids~

p.s. What's a blog without some pics??? Here are a few from Labor Day weekend at the cabin.

Ms. Savannah Lee with her catch of the day! :) (there were a bunch of girls there so we had quite the time deciding who got the pleasure of unhooking the fish... group effort, had to have been there. lol)

Lacey Mae's butt was fixed there.

haha. It's not the picture of child abuse that it looks like. She was smiling till the fish flicked it's tail and got too close to her for comfort.

She's never to freaked out to pose though. This was seconds later after all I said was, "Smile, Dion!" lol (Notice the leg prop? haha)

Yep... he's turning into quite the young man, isn't he? :)

A better one of Dion. The water was faaaaa-reeeezing!

It seems like just yesterday he had training wheels on his bike. Then his first day riding without them. And now this??? I kissed him goodnight the night before school started... and cried for 10 minutes after he walked down the hall because I realized I didn't have to bend down to hug him and give him a kiss. He just looked up and smooched me... no tip toes, no swooping down, none of it. :_(

A Break!

Hello!

Well last weekend I had my 10-year high school reunion. Wow! I can't believe I am that old. lol. I unfortunately took on a large portion of the planning and setting up, so I was a little stressed about the whole weekend. It went well though, overall. I am not speaking to my life-long friend, Chelsey (Wilson). We have been friends since Kindergarten. A long time, I know. We have had our offs and ons throughout the years. I started having kids when she was off in college being a partying sororiety girl. Then she wasn't the most supportive when Mike and I were going through all of our stuff a few years back. Well, I shouldn't say not supportive - it was just in more of a judgemental and opinionated way than I needed at the time. Basically, we have had our falling outs but have managed to fall back "in" eventually. I don't know if that will happen this time though. Anyway, the point of the story was that needless to say Chelsey was at the reunion. It was kinda akward. Plus everyone remembered us being pretty best friends all through childhood and the fact that we didn't even look in each other's direction and went out of our way to not be in the same group pictures was a little obvious. Kinda childish, I know, but life nonetheless. Saturday night we had an "adult" catered dinner at a friends house. 26/33 classmates were able to show up so that was a pretty good turn-out for a 10-year reunion. Then on Sunday we all met at the park for a BBQ and stuff. Everyone brought their kids and friends and family were invited as well so it was really nice. Here are a couple pics.

This is the Los Molinos High School Graduating Class of 1997 10-year reunion pic (well most of us).

This is a picture of me with a couple girlfriends. Actually, friends since grammar school- Rachel and Missy.

This is a picture of some of the graduate's kids at the park on Sunday. I have the oldest! And the most! lol. Also, I had been enrolled in Statistics and Anatomy for the Summer semester. I have decided to drop both of those classes. The bottom line is that summer courses are basically condensed semesters. So they are essentially cramming 24-27 weeks worth of work into anywhere between 5-9 weeks. My statistics class was only 5 weeks, which meant I was going to be having 2 hours worth of homework every day and an exam every other day for the next 5 weeks... while all five of my kids are home! NOT going to happen. lol. I want to enjoy the summer with the kids. They grow up too quickly. And I could tell I was going to just be stressed. So it'll set me back a semester. It'll be worth it!!

Well, I have housework and such (BUT NO HOMEWORK!!! YAY!). I will catch ya on the flip side.

~me~

~Summer Atlast~

Okay, well the last semester really kicked my butt... but it's over!! Yeah! I am still alive. :) Here is what my transcript looks like as of the end of this last semester.

Transcript
0684959 Heather Dainauskus

Transcript Information
Course/Section and Title Grade Credits Term 1
PSYC-1A General Psychology A 3.00 2006F
SOC-1 Introduction to Sociology B 3.00 2006F
MATH-101 Basic Algebra A 3.00 2006F
ENGL-1A Reading & Composition A 4.00 2006F
CHEM-2A Introduction to Chemistry A 5.00 2007S
SPCH-60 Public Speaking A 3.00 2007S
ENGL-31 Creative Writing A 3.00 2007S
MATH-102 Intermediate Algebra B 4.00 2007S

Total Earned Credits 28.00
Total Grade Points 105.00
Cumulative GPA 3.750

I shouldn't have gotten a 'B' in Math 102 this last semester because I am really good at math and I actually enjoy it. However, I spent A LOT of time trying to make sure I did well in Speech and Chemistry, which were my harder classes. So I kind of slacked on the Math until the last minute. Oh well... we live and learn. :)

I am taking Anatomy and Statistics over the summer. AHH! Scary. :) But I love the fact that it is only for 6 weeks instead of the semester long 18-21 weeks. I'm one of those "immediate gratification seeking" persons. lol. Then in the Fall I will take Microbiology and a couple other required courses in order to transfer to Chico in the Spring of next year. It's going.... :)

Other than that... the kids just finished up their Little League season on Saturday. That was a relief. Savannah graduated preschool last Friday...

And Addie also graduated from pre-school the same day...

But the older kids won't get out until the 20th. Kind of a short summer. It seems they are getting shorter and shorter as the years go by. Kinda sad for the kids, I think.

Here is one of my most favorite pics of Savannah EVER! At Uncle Justin's birthday part.

Well, I've gotta skidattle. Just thought I'd update this a little. Hope this finds all of you well. :)

With Love,

~me~

I love music!

One of my new favorite songs.

Occupation: Professional Procrastinator

Good Morning!! Suprised to see me back so soon, aren't cha? :)

I took the kids to school, came home and fed my foster baby, Airk, and despite the messy house that my OCD is screaming at me to clean, I am sitting down to do homework. I've realized that I need to treat school like a full time job with a LOT of overtime required over the next week and half in order to catch up. Now, sensibly, had I treated school like a part-time job over the last couple months, there wouldn't be this pressure. However, I am learning to not procrastinate as much these days. By the time school is out, perhaps, I won't procrastinate at all anymore. Oh, WOW! My nose just bought knocked a hole through my computer screen; I'd better not go that far. :) I found a few things that I feel like I must have written in my sleep or something, here they are:

"The sooner I fall behind, the more time I have to catch up." ~Anonymous

Anyway, so I was kinda bummed last night coming home from Chemistry class. I found out that my current grade in Chemistry, should the semester end right this second, is a 92%. Woo-Hoo you are probably thinking. Uhm, not so much. I still have a final to take on Monday. So essentially, after some elementary math, I realize I need to pretty much Ace my final exam, as in only miss like 10, to retain my A as a final grade. NOT GOOD! However, atleast I now will have time to come to terms with accepting a 'B' and won't have to stress too terribly over the final exam. Not that I won't try my best, just that... yeah, I don't have to stress as much.

Math is going alright. I kinda fell behind during the move because of some internet hook-up malfunctions that caused me to miss some assignments. (*Okay, okay... as WELL as SOME tiny procrastinating.*) But I was able to talk to my professor and thankfully she agreed to let me make them up as long as I submitted them before the final. So I was up until 3:20 last night doing Math. Fun stuff, lemme tell ya.

I am about to listen to a tape of Pastor Gil's message on Sunday, which I missed. It's for my speech class as well. I have to write a couple pages evaluating his speech assembly techniques along with some other areas that I have NO credentials to evaluate, but it's the assignment. I think I will probably get a 'B' in there as well. Unfortunately, I have my best friend, Procrastination, to thank for that too. But, like I said, I am getting better at not procrastinating; because for my last speech, the one that was worth the most points, my Speech To Persuade or Motivate, I didn't procrastinate - I gave myself plenty of time to revise the outline several times, AND I even had a day to practice it on my kids and poor Megan. And my teacher said it was the best speech of the evening; so I am pretty sure I'll get an 'A' for that one. Although, I don't know how much bragging rights that actually gives me, as the 5 other student speeches that took place that night were fairly subpar to begin with. My speech was: "To persuade my audience to support our soldiers who are deployed in Iraq by sending letters and care packages." I was up against speeches that were: "To persuade my audience to get tested for STD's" and "To persuade my audience to petition to lower the voting age in California to 14."; you get the picture. Now had I only exercised this skill on the three big speeches prior, I would not be looking at a 'B' for a final grade. Oh well, such is the lessons of living and learning.

As for my English class. It's a Creative Writing class. It meets my Humanities Requirements. Enough said. About a week into the class, I realized that they should put for prerequisites for the course: CREATIVITY! I would have appreciated that heads up. I mean - it's not like I should've figured it out from the name of the course! :P Oh well, it's going. I like to talk, as you all know, and I can type fast, so it would logically seem like I could fast talk-type and get through the course. However, one of many lovely qualities is that I often talk without thinking first - that doesn't translate easily into creatively writing when creativity is, well, NOT one of my lovely qualities. Which pretty much means another 'B'. Or worse yet a 'C', in which I would NOT be happy with myself about. I'll let cha know.

Well, the older three kids are all at school, Dion is at my mom's, and I just finally put Airk in the "play" room with a bunch of toys and Cheerios and a sippy cup to watch Clifford: The Big Red Dog; so I should get some actual work done. (And by quoting play room, what I meant is that it is aka - Shane's room; I didn't mean that it was some sort of dungeon I call a play room to make myself feel better. Just for clarification purposes.)

Love ya All! Hope you have a great Thursday and weekend to come.

~me~

Unexpected first post after being MIA.

Hi There! Well, I've been gone for a while now, as you can see from my last post, and was intending on writing another "update" of sorts to account for the missing months. However, that drew my attention to the fact that I should save us all a lot of confusion and just title my blog - THE UPDATE SERIES! :) That, sadly, is NOT the marvelous journal of my life I had aspired for. Hopefully you'll be able to check back and be surprised by an actual real time depiction of whats new in our neighborhood.

Hope this finds all of you well! And I will be back soon! Promise this time.

xoxoxo

~me~

Up to Speed.

So, I am still at my parent's house. (God Bless them!) We got here January 6th. It was supposed to be for less than a week; January 15th AT THE LATEST! Whelp, here we are... 6 weeks later. The story is that we will get our key to our brand new apartment on the 1st of March. However, after getting our hopes up several times in the last couple months, I have finally realized to picture ourselves here indefinately... (don't freak out Mom and Dad)... In doing this, a sort of reverse psychology, surely we will get the place when we least expect it... which would be the 1st since that is what we were told. Ya following me here? lol.

The kids are excited about the whole "apartment" thing. Who'da thunk? Excited to move out of our brand new, really big house... into an apartment!?! Here's a little insight as to the cause for this excitement. THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE CONCEPT OF AN APARTMENT IS!! lol. Lacey can't wait to move because she wants to know what "Room Number" her bedroom door is; and Savannah think's they will probably have good room service. Show's what they know, huh? Boy are they in for it. ;) However, this is actually a tremendous blessing. I was worried how I was going to convince them that this move would be the best thing for us right now. With trying to get school done as quickly as possible I really needed to simplify and downsize. Too much of my time in the last year was spent telling them I was busy, while I dusted and vaccummed and exercised my OCD cleaning and organizing habits. And then I would be tired and irritable the next morning from staying up until 3 or 4, sometimes 5 in the morning with homework. But if their grandure of what an apartment is, combined with the new swimming pool, playground, and weight room that's there, helps this move to go smoothly and enjoyably, then that is fine by me! :)

So, just a brief update on each of the chitlin's....

Shane just turned 9 in January. I am sure you are wondering how on Earth I am old enough to have a 9-year-old when I barely look 23. haha. Anyway... he is in the 3rd grade and doing VERY well. It's his first year in Minor baseball; for this season I am now a Dodgers fan... DON'T SHOOT! lol. He is turning into such a little man around the house. And with a little more influence from the right people he will be a great big brother, which will definately be a FULL-TIME job.

Lacey just turn 7 in January, going on 13. She is doing unbelievably great in 1st grade. I was told at her parent/teacher conference a couple weeks ago that she is at the top of her 1st grade class, which consists of over 50 kids (between two classes). And at the middle of the year she had met or exceeded ALL of the standards for 1st grade AS WELL AS nearly all of the standard for passing 2nd grade! By the end of the year she could actually skip a grade. (Although that won't be happening.) She is on the Phillies t-ball team this season with Savannah, and is definately gonna be my homerun girl.





Savannah will be 5 this April, and is enjoying her first year in pre-school at a private Christian school. Her teacher is in love with her. :) And of course so are a couple other boys in her class. I wrote a blog about it on Myspace, I'll have to transfer it later maybe. Anyway, she absolutely LOVES babies. Is such a HUGE help with all the foster babies... a Miniature Mom of sorts. She is soooo sweet and soo good. I feel bad sometime that she doesn't really get the attention the other kids get, but with her - she doesn't demand it like the other kids *cough*DION*cough* do. :) Savannah is just naturally an angel.



P.S.~She just recently cut 9-inches off and donated it to Locks of Love! I was so proud of her!





And now to Dion. As my good friend says, "Ohhhh, Dion!" She is TOO much! She'll be 3 on March 2 and is Heeeeee-STERICAL! I honestly don't know what to say... so I'll just leave you with some pictures... haha.

"Whud you mean, my node id runnin'?"

Okay, so those weren't the pics I wanted to put up... I will have to try later.

That's about it for now I suppose. I will be bloggin' to ya again soon. :)


God Bless!